“Break the girls, you break the men”

Trigger warning: this is about abortion rights in North America, and a dictator in Sudan.

State after state is clamping down on the reproductive rights of women. From shutting down planned parenthood, to making contraception nearly impossible to get (if you’re poor), to jail time for even aborting dead fetuses. And this angle is spreading to Canada

This isn’t about babies, this is about crisis and control over women and men alike.

Omar al-Bashir, the 30 year dictator of Sudan, who was recently deposed and jailed, said it. “Break the girls, because if you break the girls, you break the men“.

He said it after ordering his soldiers to rape and beat the protesters (70 percent female) demanding his ouster.

This is the extreme version of what the hard right is aiming for. Women change during pregnancy, women change after childbirth.

They become more passive and malleable, their focus is on one tiny universe, and most work endlessly to build that or those tiny universes, and the rest of the world goes away for a couple of years.

They also take less risks in order to protect that tiny universe, including thing like political movements. And men loyal to her cause, and to that tiny universe, bow to it, support it.

In a non political sense, it truly is a beautiful thing to bear.

But when politicians stuff their noses into it, force it on people… who for whatever reason aren’t able to give it their all to that tiny universe, or the universe ended unexpectedly, the consequences are terrible.

Take away the power of fifty percent of the population (women), make another 40 percent bound by financial hardship (men) and you’re golden.

When a person is saddled with all of the responsibilities of their and others lives, they need a mete of control. There needs to be a balance, or things can become catastrophic.

The right wing government has proven time and again, they are actively putting one hundred percent of the responsibility squarely on women for everything baby related, yet ensuring she has zero control.

It’s a sick system.

Sounds much like an abusive relationship, and some serious chaos making. Get women pregnant, and keep the chaos and crises at a maximum, and they won’t leave. Keep men working 60 hours a week and coming home to a stressed out miserable wife and they won’t leave.

And by leave I mean, get political, find solutions, have electoral reform, revolt, anything.

And the suffering is immense. Children born into poverty are more likely to suffer their whole lives.

Suffer ptsd, eating disorders, drug addiction, low marks in school, lower wages, diseases of despair, heart attacks and certain cancers.

This costs society, it costs taxpayers, it costs in our infrastructure.

They are also more likely to end up doing crime, and in jail. Which in Alabama is pretty handy considering they have for profit prisons. Which makes me wonder how much they lobby (see pocket padding) politicians.

This isn’t about babies. Or religion. It’s about power and money. Neither of which any of us will have after these guys are finished.

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Boundaries

There are countless articles on self improvement, on toxic workplaces And various other relationships in life that touch on Boundaries, they go viral, and just like any other meme eventually drown in the information haze.

We live in a society that, although very keen on pushing politically correct behavior, never address the essential boundaries that are at the basic level of the movement.

Our society has also built a multi trillion dollar socio economic institution that capitalizes on the abuse or disrespect of personal or group boundaries.

The media we consume is ever more narcissistic or codependent packaged in hypersexualized shallow constructs.

Love is a story of uncontrollable infatuation where intimacy is replaced by sex, communication with substances or abuse of some sort, and boundaries are not applicable.

Helicopter parenting, narcissist spouses, parents and children, abusive bosses and coworkers and even hr departments.

Don’t make waves, and never say no, or you won’t get a promotion, you’ll be vilified, cut off, and sent to assertiveness purgatory.

It’s toxic, it’s also unsustainable. Boundaries keep people healthy, functioning reasonably well, and generally give opportunity for all individuals to improve whatever happens to be at the core of the relationship.

But, we seem to have a real issue with boundaries, and the people who use them. I’m not sure why, maybe one day it will come to me though.

Until then, have a happy