Are the watchers watching?

I’ve been seeing a disturbing trend on reddit (4 chan is the main center but I’m not a user) the past couple of years that started off disconcerting, and has escalated to fear.

As well I’m seeing a cycle of aggression/ anger that is tied to the news via interpersonal relationships.

What do these things have in common?

The alt right.

Alex Jones has been diagnosed with Narcissistic personality disorder, Trump is speculated to be one, Doug Ford? Most likely. And they are figureheads for a particular group of people. Mostly men, but some women as well.

I’m going to add another piece to this puzzle. In group therapy for women who have suffered domestic abuse, the partner in question could be the same guy for each different woman.

Because people like that are narcissistic abusers.

Alex Jones has made a living on taking off the charismatic mask narcissists wear, and being the angry paranoid trainwreck that most abuse survivors see behind closed doors.

Think about it.

There are people that abuse and manipulate their families with impunity, that have charisma and power. Not just power, control over the media.

Narcissists are drawn to power and attention, and will stop at nothing to gain control over something or someone in order to serve their needs.

What I’m seeing on reddit are a bunch of people that openly and vehemently hate, women, LGBTQ2, different cultures etc. People that are alluding to being armed to “protect themselves from the government”. People that will choke their spouse or beat their kids in order to gain control, and if they still can’t control them go as far as to kill them.

This isn’t limited to North America.. this is global. There are people like this around the world, politicians like this round the world and they are talking to each other, feeding off each other in dark little echo chambers on the internet.

They think they are entitled to constant adulation, and think they are superior, and everyone is here to serve their narcissistic needs and wants.

They have no empathy. Zero. No respect for law. And if you injure their ego, there is hell to pay.

So running at this again.

There is a group of people who have no empathy, that have sociopolitical power, access to each others resources, are emotionally unstable and are capable of violence to their kin, likely armed, that want power, control and adulation.

These are the Timothy McVeighs. These are ISIS guys. They’re all the same.

Are the watchers watching this?

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Starting fresh

I’ve decided to create a new blog, with a shiny new email address in order to create a professional space to write.

Personal blogs are great for sharing thoughts and ideas, but I’m coming to realize that i need to find a more professional outlet to move forward in life.

I’ll continue to keep up with my personal blogs as I have time and inspiration.

Thank you all for joining me, in this adventure

Cheers, and have a happy!

The c word again

I have a friend in her mid to late thirties who has stage 3 breast cancer.

The doctor she had presented her lump to almost two years ago told her she was fine and it was all in her head.

Told her she had PTSD and anxiety. Two years for the cancer to grow and spread, and now after fighting for all that time is finally receiving treatment.

Round after round of chemo and years of tamoxifen in order to keep her cancer free. If she survives.

Shes an amazing, beautiful woman that I carry so much respect for, and I will never be able to convey it in any way that makes any level of sense.

Anyways she posted yesterday on social media a statement about all of these people talking about hair. Which hairstyle? What colour? Etc. Obviously, shes going through chemo, had no hair to speak of and its stung her a bit (a lot)

And I started to reply, but my statement may not be appropriate for the thread, bit i still want to get it out.

So here goes.

“It is just hair. It comes and goes, and we tend as women and men to be told that our hair in part, defines us. Our looks, our jobs our clothing are the definition of who we are.

But when life strips us of these things we’re still there. Naked and raw.

Sometimes life is gentle about it, and sometimes she’s ruthless, but eventually we stand there, naked, among our peers but most importantly, in front of ourselves to see ourselves in full.. to observe what we truly value, and who we really are.

How we proceed in those days is what defines us.”

And she has done an incredible job of being. In all of these harsh moments, fear or not, she has stepped up and confronted what it is to be human every day.

All I can say is, shes remarkable.

Poking my head up

Little stories. Introduction

Everyone has a story, a life that is hidden or not so much from your view.

External and internal universes that are carried around surreptitiously, packed in an average human body. Most often than not buried six feet under at the end of the bodily life with minimal acknowledgement from the outside world.

I’m constantly curious about those stories, as they almost always surprising and extraordinary. So many supposedly average people, each unique and remarkable but unsung.

My hat is off to humanity on a daily basis even though we’re collectively having some big global issues.

The individual is what inspires me and gives me hope for next transition of the human species.

The funny thing about Mets is….

A few months ago I broke down and talked to my new doctor about my spouse’s melanoma.

He was diagnosed a month after the twins were born and given a poor prognosis. Fifty percent chance of survival at five years with treatment.

He had the original mole/tumor removed, and never went back.

Fast forward 2.5 years and I still have a lot of questions. He has more strange looking moles becoming more apparent.

My assumption is that it’s spread. I brought it up to the doctor, told him the timeline, and prognosis.

He was immediately concerned.

His first words we’re, “The funny thing about Mets is, they start off small and depending on where they are they can take a very long time to grow.”

I like this doctor… I think He should be a professor for how well explains medical stuff to me.

We discussed the locations and likelihood of growth in his lungs, internal organs and brain.

Even in the brain, there are many outcomes of growth of a metastasis.

So I watch and wait. I really don’t know what for. For illness I suppose, for unusual weight loss or behavior changes, or coordination issues.

I question his bleeding. He bleeds a lot in his sleep due to being a construction worker. Blood on the floor in the bathroom or toilet. I wonder an abnormal amount.

I’ve developed a back up plan of his behavior changes more than to be expected considering everything.

If he gets violent. Because that can happen… And we have kids.

I’ve tried to start looking at career options and due to being an almost 40 year old, and a stay at home parent, my chances of a normal career are slim.

I’m past being terrified, I’m just holding onto hope that maybe it’s a bad dream until the day comes that it’s just a terrible fact.

Cancer hides and so do some cancer sufferers.

And on a related note: check your skin once a month. Especially if you have a freckle or mole that is unusual. Don’t put off going to the doctor. Early detection and treatment increases survival by a lot.

Beauty

There’s a constant flow of talk about looks.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder

Beauty is only skin deep

Too fat, too thin, too tall, too short

Is it media? Commercialism?

We’re all barraged daily in regards to beauty, its definition, its value and the consequences of not fitting that ideal.

Eating disorders, clothing hoarding, personal hygiene products, ointments galore, plastic surgery from face to genitals, and financial hardship all to chase an ideal.

But the concept of ideal beauty shifts with the wind, differs between cultures, and varies through the ages for men and women alike.

And 99 percent of us never make the cut.

How many relationships with good People are damaged on a daily basis from our skewed value upon the looks of people?

How many housewives are torn down daily by their husbands offhand remarks of how this woman (who looks nothing like her) is hot and all the rest are disgusting… how many little girls question themselves for It?

How many men beat themselves up because they’re never going to be the next Brad Pitt? And how many think that is what women want in a man?

Our view of beauty is ugly, how we treat ourselves and other who aren’t and will never be a “10/10” is ugly. Our value in the superficial aspects of humanity, the stuff that never really lasts is ugly.

Very few him and can make a living with their looks. Looks may help in the short term, but, it’s the beauty of the mind, the sheer will, hard work and integrity of people that gives us our community, and our ability to move forward.

Its the beauty of countless people sacrificing their time, their careers, their ideals to help others, to rear children, to give back to their communities which is beautiful.

It’s the creators and builders and dreamers, the counselors and hope givers that give a sense of belonging and richness, merging purpose and hope, and the thought of more in life which is beautiful.

It’s the mundane that we love about each other. The mundane stuff in our loved ones lives that due to the nature of intimacy, that is truly beautiful. How our children sleep or have tiny gestures that are their own, how our spouse hums while washing the dishes, or how a parent or grandparent spins a tale or leaves an item of care. Just in case.

Those things, are vulnerability and earnestness and compassion and empathy, they are representations of someone allowing you into the deepest most untouched parts of themselves. And each person is different.

And truly beautiful.

Looks come and go, but the person inside is there, the impact they have on us is there, and lasting. Even if their name is lost in the sands of time, their impact will always move forward.

That is beautiful.

And you.. you are beautiful ❤

For anyone who follows such things that involve the future of technology in civilization, they have most likely heard of Ray Kurzweil.

He’s mentioned and written about a very real probability that humanity will merge with tech treating it as a natural step in the progression of human evolution. He calls it The Singularity.

There are many questions that can be raised while doing thought experiments on the concept in itself.

• First: Would all of humanity be welcome in the digital paradigm shift? How many people would join permanently, how many would be intermittent, and how many would resist?

• Second: What would come of the psychological human condition? Individually as well as in groups?
• Would technological advancement continue on the same curve, or would the addition of humans that may have never been involved in development outside of the singularity change the course and aspects of how technology is developed?
• The Singularity may also arrive at around the same time that many jobs and careers are automated. Will civilization be prepared for the eventual financial bottom to drop?
• Is this becoming reminiscent of Star Trek’s Borg concept? Possibly.

I have many other questions, but these seem to be rolling around my head most often as of late.

Feel free to respond if you want, I would love some feedback and discussion.

The big shift

There is a local first nations leader, Chief Clarence Louis. He leads the Osoyoos nation and he’s a business man, he’s funny, and he’s a hard ass.

The Osoyoos band though, has shifted remarkably into capitalizing on the resources of the reservation in a modern fashion, adapting to the tourism industry that the Okanagan is known for, and employing it’s people in the process.

The industries they chose are reasonably sustainable, and aren’t founded on mining, logging or removal of the resources There, and as tourism in the Okanagan goes, the industries are adaptable and are open to complimentary business.

Back to Chief Louis though.

As I said before, he’s a hard ass, he’s pushing for all first nations people to work. And for the young men to pull up their boot straps. And I think that he has many lessons to offer society in general.

For all of the hard working men and women out there, regardless of whether they are on a traditional career path, blazing trails, or at home rearing children (quite often with part time work), there are many people of all ages that aren’t working.

There are a myriad of reasons people don’t or can’t work, and I’m not writing to pass judgement, but to question how we view work in an economy that is changing rapidly.

If the estimates are remotely accurate, 25 percent of the workforce by 2025 will be replaced via automation. Add to that, the baby boomers that are marching towards retirement – a whopping 29 percent of the population of Canada alone, we are looking at almost 50 percent of the nation’s adult population unemployed and or unemployable at the same time.

That means government income tax revenue is going to take an incredible hit, yet will still be expected to provide the same level of social welfare programs.

The people working for the federal government have known about the pension shortfall coming with the baby boomers retiring en masse for at least 25 years, and yet are still ill prepared for it, and with the addition of the wild card that is automation, we are staring point blank at a very real fiscal crisis.

Not to mention the social implications of having half of the population with little to do to fill their lives and give them a sense of purpose and belonging.

Most himans thrive on feeling needed and wanted in their community on some level. They wish to contribute and derive dignity, purpose and varying types of relationships through work, and community service, and a livable income.

How do we ensure that people aren’t going to be left behind in this futuristic world that we’re building?

Shanty towns of impoverished people build along side the most advanced technological society that humanity can conceive at the moment seems like an absolutely ridiculous notion.

The concept has been explored for more than half a century, with varying outcomes in many fictional universes, it’s a reality in some cities around the world already.

As a person that sees the value in humanity, and the potential in individuals, I wonder what kind of solution could be created to move all of civilization forward, not just a select few (That will all likely become obsolete once full automation becomes a reality)

The Venus Project is a great concept, and as we begin to merge ourselves with technology, it could be better adapted to al people’s needs.

But the construct of money needs to be looked at, consumerism in itself is going to be a thing of the past if so many people aren’t going to be working.

A basic income is a great stop gap and it’s being tested, a town in Albert a has guaranteed housing for all people, and on a socioeconomic level it’s apparently going well.

But it all goes back to human contributions to this new society that is emerging. We need to do stuff, have something to wake up for, or we degrade.

Chief Louis is right, people need to work, we need to adapt, and have purpose. We also need a kick in the rear, because we are sitting on the pot with our pants down, and the door is unlocked.

It’s just a matter of time before inevitability strolls through the door and has a good laugh at our expense.

It’s time for the movers and shakers to pull up their boot straps, for the average Joe to prepare for a starkly different reality.

Boundaries

There are countless articles on self improvement, on toxic workplaces And various other relationships in life that touch on Boundaries, they go viral, and just like any other meme eventually drown in the information haze.

We live in a society that, although very keen on pushing politically correct behavior, never address the essential boundaries that are at the basic level of the movement.

Our society has also built a multi trillion dollar socio economic institution that capitalizes on the abuse or disrespect of personal or group boundaries.

The media we consume is ever more narcissistic or codependent packaged in hypersexualized shallow constructs.

Love is a story of uncontrollable infatuation where intimacy is replaced by sex, communication with substances or abuse of some sort, and boundaries are not applicable.

Helicopter parenting, narcissist spouses, parents and children, abusive bosses and coworkers and even hr departments.

Don’t make waves, and never say no, or you won’t get a promotion, you’ll be vilified, cut off, and sent to assertiveness purgatory.

It’s toxic, it’s also unsustainable. Boundaries keep people healthy, functioning reasonably well, and generally give opportunity for all individuals to improve whatever happens to be at the core of the relationship.

But, we seem to have a real issue with boundaries, and the people who use them. I’m not sure why, maybe one day it will come to me though.

Until then, have a happy